


The Twelve Sleepy Scientists

by flitterflutterfly



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Fluff and Crack, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-19
Updated: 2013-02-19
Packaged: 2017-11-29 20:52:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/691319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flitterflutterfly/pseuds/flitterflutterfly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Twelve of the most brilliant scientists of Atlantis have been acting very strangely lately and Queen Elizabeth tasks a strange wanderer to find out why. The reward: choosing one of them to be his bride.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Twelve Sleepy Scientists

**Author's Note:**

> A variation of The Twelve Dancing Princesses, for the Once Upon a Time prompt in stargateland.

Queen Elizabeth of the Kingdom of Atlantis was a wise ruler, but a weary one. She had been the leader of Atlantis for a great many years and soon wished to choose an heir to take over the throne. Since the queen had no children of her own, she had chosen twelve scientists to be potential rulers.

The scientists, after all, were the most intelligent in the land.

Except, as she began to try to figure out which scientist would be best, she noticed that they all were acting very strange. Just the other night, Radek had fallen asleep in the middle of a meeting. Peter had taken a nap in the middle of the day, something he never did. And Rodney had waved away  _blue jello_  in favor of crappy coffee.

Blue jello!

Queen Elizabeth needed to figure out why her scientists were all so sleepy. Luckily, just then a strange wanderer appeared in the kingdom. She invited him into court, curious about his hair that defied gravity and quirky smile.

“Welcome, stranger, I am Queen Elizabeth,” she said. “And you are?”

“John,” the stranger said.

“John?” Elizabeth. “The Wraith-killer, leader of the last great war for the Pegasus kingdom?”

“Yeah,” John rubbed the back of his neck. “That’s me.”

Elizabeth had a brilliant idea just then. Hey, she might not be a scientist, but she wasn’t stupid. “You must have been wandering for a long time, your previous home destroyed by the Wraith…”

John frowned, wondering where the queen was going with this. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Well, John,” Elizabeth said. “I’m willing to offer you a home on Atlantis, if you’ll just do one thing for me.”

“What thing?” John asked suspiciously.

“I have a mystery,” Elizabeth said. “My twelve heirs, the best scientists on the city, have been unusually tired lately. Find out why, and you can even choose one of them to marry and live in this kingdom for the rest of your days.”

John thought that perhaps the queen was a little crazy and really needed to retire soon. He kept that to himself though, because hey he could swing this mission. He’d solved worse in his sleep.

“You’ve got yourself a deal.”

That night, John decided that he really didn’t care to start finding out the mystery right away and so slept in the warm bed. The next morning, the queen asked him if he’d figured out the mystery yet.

“Give me a little time,” he said. She frowned, but nodded.

The next night, John gulped down some coffee and began to wander the city-kingdom, looking for the scientists. He spotted one, the reputed most brilliant scientist Rodney, looking around.

John hid in a corner and watched Rodney out of the corner of his eye. One part of him noticed the man’s gorgeously geeky appearance, but most of him was set on figuring out where the man was going so secretively.

The thing is, John was the leader of the Pegasus army against the Wraith. This kingdom, they were protected behind a shield and had never been touched by war. It wasn’t very hard for John to follow Rodney. He barely even needed to walk quietly.

Soon enough, John found himself turning the corner into a secret room of the kingdom. There, all twelve scientists were puttering around.

A short crazy-haired scientist and a handsome scientist were tinkering with a miny flying machine. Next to them, two thin scientists cooed over a strange planet. In the corner, five scientists were muttering over calculations on a board.

And Rodney. Well Rodney was as brilliant as his title suggested. Simultaneously, he fixed a strange glowing crystal, shouted to the planet-watchers, erased and fixed the calculations, and added a subset wiring to the flying machine.

“Really?” John frowned, stepping into the room. “This is boring. I was expecting some sort of state secret, or maybe dancing princes, or something.”

All the scientists stared at him in shock.

John sighed. “My name is John. I’m a guest in the kingdom. The queen asked me to find out why you guys were so sleepy all the time. Apparently, you’re all workaholics.”

“The Wraith-killer,” one of the scientists in the back whispered. He though she might be called Miko.

John resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

“You,” Rodney pointed a finger at John. John couldn’t help but notice that the blue-eyed scientist seemed a bit taken aback by his laid-back appearance. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Why?” John asked, leaning against the door frame. Rodney’s eyes widened and he hid his grin. That always worked.

The scientists all turned red and exchanged shameful glanced. “Because we’re not supposed to be here.” Radek, or at least John assumed that was the short one, said.

“Why?” John asked again.

“Labs are closed after dark,” Peter, the handsome one, crossed his arms. “To prevent us from overworking ourselves.”

“But we had to!” David said, besides him, his plant-partner Katie nodded.

“What?” John shook his head. “Can’t you just do this during the day? I mean, you’re scientists aren’t you?”

“Yes, we’re scientists,” another back scientist, Alison, frowned. “That’s not the point.”

“What is the point?” John asked. “You’re scientists, you do this stuff every day all day, and now you suddenly feel the need to do it at night too? Sleep isn’t just something you can choose to do… it’s kind of necessary.”

“You don’t understand!” Radek cried.

“Elizabeth named us her heirs,” Peter explained. “Whomever she choses to succeed her, that person will no longer be able to work.”

“Ruling is work,” John pointed out.

“Exactly right,” Rodney interjected. “Ruling is it’s own work. Leaving no time for the work that really matters-”

“That we really enjoy,” David cut in.

“Science!” Rodney finished, glaring at David for interrupting him.

“Well, Rodney,” John said. “I thought you were a genius. The most brilliant of the scientists? Couldn’t you do science and rule the kingdom?”

Rodney scowled. “You can’t trick me, John. Yes, I am a genius, but I don’t want to waste my time listening to the stupid problems the people come up with that are in no way a challenge to my genius-ness.”

John raised a eyebrow. “What if you had someone else to listen to those ‘stupid’ problems in your stead? Then you could still work on your science. And,” he turned to the other scientists, “with Rodney as the ruler, he would be in your hair less. You know, just when it’s important.”

“YES!” Came the cries of the other scientists.

“But who?” Katie asked. “Who would marry Rodney?”

“Hmm,” John sighed dramatically. “Well, I suppose for the sake of the kingdom, I could.”

Rodney gaped, blinking his big blue eyes in shock. “I, you, what?”

“The queen already offered me one of your hands in marriage if I figured this mystery out,” John shrugged. “What do you say, Rodney? Will you be my wife?”

“W-,” Rodney sputtered. “No, I will not be your wife!”

John deflated suddenly, his plan having counted on the looks he’d been so sure Rodney had been sending his way. “Oh.”

“Rodney!” Miko burst into tears.

“Are you stupid, man,” Brendan scowled. “Do you even see how hot he is?”

John preened slightly, but it wasn’t them that he cared about, it was the most brilliant blue-eyed scientist. “No, it’s okay. I’m sure there are others in the kingdom that would be happy to marry you and solve your little problem.”

“Would you all shut up,” Rodney scowled. “I won’t be your  _wife_ , John. I’m not a fuc-” he cast a glance in Miko’s direction, “-freaking girl!”

“I get to plan the wedding!” Alison said.

“Me too, me too,” Katie clapped her hands.

“Well, f-“ John began.

“Fun!” Rodney interrupted immediately, pulling John aside. “Don’t say the F-word,” he hissed. “Miko’s sensitive.”

“Scientists are weird,” John said, shaking his head.

Rodney scowled again. John was beginning to think it was his default expression.

Well, John thought. That ass makes up for all of it. Then he kissed Rodney on the lips.

And they lived happily ever scientists.

(Except John, who spent his days listening to the not quite stupid problems of the people and then later dragging his  _husband_  away from the lab to take back to the room and-

Well, this story is only PG-13, so.

Let’s just stick with Happily Ever After.)


End file.
